Shawn's Pulse 2 Review

2008 Movie #135 - Pulse 2

Well at least it’s good to know that even at this stage in the game it’s not too late for movies to enter the bottom 10 of the year. Pulse 2 now officially makes that list with a bullet. I’ve been putting off watching it forever but with the upcoming release of Pulse 3, I was curious to see if maybe they were actually taking the story somewhere interesting to justify a trilogy. Turns out nope…good god nope.

This movie is fucking atrotious in ways that are rarely seen. Let’s start with the movie’s existence in the first place. I’ve never seen the original Japanese Pulse but I saw the unrated cut of the remake. It was not very good, not terrible mind you, but not good. Certainly not worthy of a sequel. But then when has that stopped anyone from making them these days.

At least if they had done something worthwhile with the plot of the movie then maybe it would be ok. The first movie ended on a downer note that actually could have lead to a pretty interesting sequel. I don’t know what the fuck happened here though. If someone asked me to list 100 possible plot lines for Pulse 2, none of them would have been even close to this one. Who the fuck thought this was a story worth telling? This could have been a pretty cool end of the world scenario movie but instead it’s just a huge cock-up.

The acting is, as expected, quite bad. It’s not the worst I’ve ever seen in one of these DTD sequels, but it’s bad. That’s basically all I have to say about the acting really. Let’s get on to the element of this movie that is so amazingly terrible I almost can’t believe it.

The special effects in this movie are jaw dropping. I don’t know what the budget of this movie actually was but it couldn’t have been more than 96 cents in loose change. You know how some movies use green screen to place characters in locations that aren’t normally possible? You know maybe outer space or a volcano or Sin City or something like that? Makes sense right? Well this movie uses green screen to put characters in locations such as an alley, a street, a house, a cabin, a field, and just about anywhere else you can imagine. It’s one of the most insane fucking things I have ever seen. I thought it was my imagination at first but no such luck. How anyone thought this movie was ok to be released is beyond me.

Pulse 2 does the unimaginable and surpasses the original in pure shittiness by an epic scale. It makes Pulse 1 look like fucking Back to the Future. I almost want to watch Pulse 3 more now just to see if they make up for this, or somehow take things even further. Stay far, FAR, away from this one.

0/5